CROWN ROYAL CHRISTMAS COOKIES:
Ingredients You will need:

1 cup water

1 tsp baking soda

1 cup of sugar

1 tsp salt

1 cup brown sugar

lemon juice

4 large eggs

1 cup nuts

2 cups dried fruit

1 bottle Crown Royal

Directions:

~Sample the Crown Royal to check quality~

~Take a large bowl, check the Crown Royal again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

~Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

~Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again.

~At this point it's best to make sure the Crown Royal is still OK, try another cup...just in case.

~Turn of the mixer thingy.

~Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

~Pick the fruit up off floor...

~Mix on the turner.

~If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a dewscriver.

~Sample the Crown Royal to check for tonsisticity.

~Next, sift two cups of salt, or something...

who giveshz a sheet.

~Check the Crown Royal.

~Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

~Add one table.

~Add a spoon of ar, or somefink...whatever you can find.

~Greash the oven.

~Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

~Finally, throw the bowl through the window.

~Finish the bottle of Crown Royal.

~Make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

Cherry Mistmas~!

James & 'The Giz'